Photo op: world’s largest ice cream

Seriously…have you seen the size of it? OMG! It’s not every day you get photo bombed by a strawberry delight.

H x


New balls please!

Wimbledon fever has just about calmed down here in the UK, but there’s no reason why a handsome hound can’t still request some new balls (no sniggering please, I just heard Mum say to Dad that the ‘special operation’ is in the diary for early August)!

Anyhow, as you know, I have my humans very well trained. So they didn’t just get me a few new balls, they got…well…THESE:


Also brilliant this spring/summer has been Mum’s discovery of a new beach at Sandwich Bay after Dad got fined £75 for taking me for a dip on Dover seafront (where they’ve changed the rules on canine companions)…ouch! Anyway, forget Dover Beach. It’s so yesterday. Sandwich Bay is THE place to be. Check me out:

Hasselhoff eat your heart out...

Step aside David Hasselhoff…

Could be treasure. Could be a dead fish. The same thing you say?

Could be treasure. Could be a dead fish. The same thing you say?

In other news, more than the aforementioned body parts are due to get the chop. No really! Mum has also scheduled in a haircut for this Friday apparently. Here’s why:

Forget photo bombing, fluff bombing is all the rage!

Forget photo bombing, fluff bombing is all the rage!

I’m pretty sure she is the one in dire need of a makeover, but given that she will have to feed me the meat off a whole chicken (or a block of cheese) to get me to sit still on the grooming table, maybe I’ll put up with it for a bit 🙂

Hope you guys are well out there and having as nice a time as me!

H x



Welcome to Hector Air – we hope you enjoy your flight

So, as you guys know, I enjoy a lot of games. But there’s nothing better than the ‘get a human to kick stones on the beach’ game (hmm…might need to think of a better name for that one)!

Here are the rules of play:

  1. Crouch down low.
  2. Stare at the stone you want until your human gets the hint.
  3. Wait for lift off (it usually takes the human a while to get their foot in the right place)
  4. Jump like your life depends on it. Maybe follow the stone, or just freestyle…whatever takes your fancy. Me, I like the airplane move. And sometimes the kangaroo.

Here’s a handy visual guide:




Begin take off


Freestyle…with a mid-air turn


And re-position for a safe landing. Easy!


Here’s a textbook airplane…check out those ear flaps.


Finally, a textbook kangaroo.


And here it all is put together. Simple!

Why not give it a go yourself? I promise you’ll enjoy it.

H x



Top 5 Seconds of Summer

What a Summer it has been! Once again, I’ve been so busy being stopped by admirers in the street (note from Hector’s Mum: more like pleading with anyone and everyone to pay you some attention) that I haven’t had much time to blog…so here’s a recap on the highlights of Summer 2015 for you.

1. My 2nd birthday!

Well, I’m pretty sure that I’m now 2 years old since Mum and Dad made me an awesome card (see below). That said, whenever strangers ask Mum how old I am, she always says ‘oh, he’s still quite young, only about 18 months, which is why he’s a bit silly and over the top.’ Charming.


Who's that handsome fellow?

2. The arrival of Mr Frog.

Now, anyone who knows me knows how much I love a good squeaky toy. This summer, a truly marvellous one arrived. Green – check. Annoyingly loud – check. Small enough to fit quite far in my mouth so no one can take it off me – check. Not yet been thrown over the neighbour’s fence – check. Love him. LOVE HIM!

Yeah...you can try to get the frog. But you will fail. Every time.

Yeah…you can try to get the frog. But you will fail. Every time.

3. The car and the fence.

Being a border collie (sort of), I do love a good stalk. I’m not talking plants. I’m talking crouching down and hunting cars. Oh yeah. I stalk cars from a mile away! Mum and Dad have tried EVERYTHING they can to stop me doing it, because it’s apparently a ‘bad habit’ (but then I always hear them talking about how people should have hobbies…hypocrites). Needless to say, I totally disregard anything that comes out of their mouths on the matter.

So when we were at Granny and Grandad’s over the summer and a big Land Rover drove by the field very quickly, I decided I’d jump the five foot fence into the lane and hunt it down. I managed to run a few circles around the car before Mum made it over the fence (rather slowly I might add) and flagged the driver down. Spoil sport.

4. A new friend.

When Mum started her latest job over the summer, she discovered that one of her new colleagues had the (mis)fortune to have just acquired a puppy…a Bordoodle named Roxie. She lives up in Scotland, lucky thing! Does she remind you of anyone?

Roxie 1Roxie 2


5. The husband swap.

Finally, one of my favourite moments of the summer was when a lady who was cuddling me in the pet shop asked if she could swap me for her husband. Apparently, I’d be much nicer to sit with on the sofa of an evening – but just as hairy and warm 🙂

Is my head getting a bit big these days? Of course not!!

H x



Happy New Year people!

Wow. It’s been ages! I hope you’re all well out there and have been living every day to the full. I certainly have 🙂

Let's play!!! What do you mean you just want to sit down for five minutes?

Let’s play!!! What do you mean you just want to sit down for five minutes?

I’ll post a review of my Summer of Fun shortly (yeah…a little late I know, but I promise you’ll love it) but before that, let’s talk about my amazing Christmas. Note to self: ‘Hector’s Amazing Christmas’ is a great idea for a movie…or maybe a book…or maybe both. Yeah, both. Anyway, Dad was lucky enough to have a whole month off work (sort of) over the festive period. That meant we could play ‘hang off the bottom of your trousers’ EVERY SINGLE DAY.

It’s also helped pass the time a bit because Mum has had a knee operation and can’t currently take me out by herself (apparently she could take out a dog that didn’t act like it was pulling a cart every time it was on the lead, whatever that means). At one point I did think she was just being lazy, but then I tested the theory by barking right in her face for about 10 minutes straight and poking my nose in my harness just in case she hadn’t quite got the message. It seems she really does have a poorly knee. But it is getting better now and we’ve been out for ice cream and all sorts:

Look how well mannered I can be...erm...I mean, I am!

Look how well mannered I can be…erm…I mean, I am!


Yes, that is a rather large yellow pole. They were putting up Christmas lights at the cafe. And yes, Mum does have her eyes closed...there's always one!

Yes, that is a rather large yellow pole. They were putting up Christmas lights at the cafe. And yes, Mum does have her eyes closed…there’s always one!

For Christmas, I got loads of treats and a soft toy turkey (now dead). Uncle Matthew bought me a cool Snowman toy too (now dead). Then Mum snapped up a stuffed penguin in the New Year sale for me (now dead). Honestly though, the best bit has been playing with the big cardboard tubes out of the middle of the wrapping paper rolls (also now dead). How much fun can one dog have?!!

In other news, I’ve been inspired by all the Strictly Come Dancing fever over Christmas (Mum and Dad left it on for me to watch while they went to the gym). What do you make of this footwork, Darcy? A nice efface methinks:

Just look at those pointed toes. 10/10 surely?

Just look at those pointed toes. 10/10 surely?


Apart from that, it’s all been rather quiet really. Just three or four walks a day, playing with my friends in the park at sun down, pinching tea towels off the counter, opening the post. You know, dog stuff.

Lots of love for now,

H x


Day of the devil

It’s been a while, I know. I’m sorry. It’s just that I’ve been sooooooo busy…erm…keeping Mum and Dad on their toes.

Honestly, it’s like a full time job. Every day I have to invent new ways to make sure they stay on top form. It’s so tiring!

This one was probably one of my best though. Perch the Bonio right on the edge of the rug, then pounce on it and push it under the sideboard. All the makings of a classic:


Speaking of classics, I pulled a textbook move today at Granny and Grandad’s. When we came in from running around in the garden, Mum got distracted for a minute and during that tiny window, I skipped off (la la la) round the corner right into the stinky pond.

Man it felt good. Mum was a bit too preoccupied to take any photos of it, but think ‘hippo in mud’ and you’ll be on the right track.

Unfortunately, ‘pond gate’ did lead to me having to have a bath – with three lots of shampoo to get rid of all the sludge – but it was well worth it. And as an added bonus, Mum decided to buy me my own ‘pond’ later in the day with the hope of discouraging a repeat (yeah right)!

H x

Where's the pond weed? Why can I see the bottom? Why doesn't this pond smell bad?

Where’s the pond weed? Why can I see the bottom? Why doesn’t this pond smell bad?



Vernal equinox means one thing…

It’s Spring…therefore…the ice cream parlours are back open. Thank the Lord!

If only the service were a bit quicker. Apparently they don’t all speak dog and some still require a human slave to do the ordering. Really?

A vanilla cornet please...

A vanilla cornet please…

Come on...I've been waiting months for this!

Come on…I’ve been waiting months for this!

Anyway, got it in the end. Bliss! Until some bloke on a bike looked like he was gonna steal it. But I saw him off with a huge helping of side eye 😉 No one comes between me and my cornet!

Nom nom nom...

Nom nom nom…


You on the bike...back away from the ice cream...

You on the bike…back away from the ice cream…

H x


Another string to my bow

As some of you will know, I became an official bus inspector (for the day) a few weeks ago. Since then, Mum and Dad have been trying to find me more jobs to do. Apparently I need to be kept busy?? Yeah, that didn’t really make sense to me either, especially when I know that the dog trainer said I have a lot of my own ‘ideas’.

Anyway, I went along with it all, as you do. So, here I am being the cafe inspector in Kearsney Abbey – caught the kitchen workers unawares by peeking through the back window!

Window Hector

I think I’d better taste that cheese (again). You can never be too careful where customers are concerned.

And here is the excellent redecorating work I did in the lounge this week.

I call it 'cloud floor'. Don't tread on my dreams.

I call it ‘cloud floor’. Don’t tread on my dreams.

You might mock, but Picasso had his detractors in the day. Just you wait.

H x